Psychologists Share 10 Things Couples Should Do to Avoid a Divorce

Divorce is so common nowadays. Many spouses ignore the alarms of discontent that their partner has been ringing. When their spouse “suddenly”announces that he or she is moving out or wants to end the marriage, the ground below shakes like an earthquake. 

Is there any way to stop a divorce? Yes!

The campfire thoughts put together a list of advice on how to avoid mistakes and save your marriage:

10. Mutual respect is a pillar for marriage

Learn how to express yourself through the prims of respect. Being respectful to your partner will allow you to avoid situations where one partner feels that the other half is manipulating or controlling the marriage. 

9. Clean up all the old hurts

Find out what resentments and hurt feelings your spouse carries that may have been factors that led to filing for a divorce. Each of you needs to look for your own mistakes, misperceptions, and misunderstanding. Learn how to forgive them and yourself even if it’s hard for you to admit your own mistakes.

8. Do not compare your partner with other people’s husbands and wives

We often compare our partners with other people’s husbands and wives. Our traits and personalities differ from one another. We should learn how to accept our partners for the way they act. If you happen to want to change your partner’s behavior, talk to him/her and explain how his/her behavior affects your marriage, but never compare your partner to other people.

7. Take care of your appearance

With many years and a few kids under your belt, it’s easy to let your appearance slide. I’m not saying you have to look elegant and dazzling every night. But at least pay your spouse the same courtesy by fixing yourself up for him or her every once in a while.

6. Avoid Big Words, especially ‘Divorce’
   Try to avoid phrases like, “If this continues, I will leave you.” or never say the word “divorce”. If you mean it, then be ready to go and see a lawyer. don’t crawl back on your knees later with words, “I did not mean it”. 

5. Learn to control your emotions over stupid little things

Such phrases, often said in anger, are not forgotten. Sometimes the best way to address a problem is to just walk away from it and let it go. If you are really angry at him/her, wait at least 30 minutes before lashing out at your partner. This will make you think twice before you act. 

4. Maintain intimacy and passion, both inside and outside the bedroom

Intimacy isn’t just s*x or and passion isn’t just doing it on the kitchen counter. Know that things changes, but that doesn’t make them less exciting or fun. Intimacy comes in many shapes, including conversation and cuddling. 

3. Never talk badly about your partner

Never say bad things about your partner especially to your friends or co-workers. Not even to your mother or kids. When things are really difficult, have a heart-to-heart talk with your spouse. Your spouse should always be your partner no matter what happens. Never talk badly behind his back.

2.  Husband is priority number one, then kids.

A married couple is the center of the family. Yes, Parenthood is all about being selflessly there for your children, but it will be a mistake if you sacrifice your marriage for it.  One day your children will grow up and leave your house and that is when you two will be left on your own. Always make time for your husband.

1. Learn your partner’s love language

      Each of us has a language of love. Learn to support and praise his/her love language. May it be with touch and care, or even with material things like gifts or surprises. 

source: brightside

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